Political Crossfire Forums

Melchior · Joined: 02 Oct 2004 Posts: 9284 Location: Palm Beach

I started a topic about bisexuality a while ago, and included a scientific spectrum with it, but that didn't work out so well...

So I'll just throw the topic out here again, but in my own opinion. I think bisexuality is greatly misunderstood, even by the gay community (who seem to believe it is a phase of transition or denial). In western culture people have the annoying need to pigeon-hole ideas into "black" and "white", which only complicates things because it isn't a black and white issue... everyone is a unique individual and throwing labels at people is restricting.

I myself have bisexual tendencies that seem to come and go, my love interest is in women (and if I get married it will be a heterosexual relationship) but I can enjoy a gay story or two, and sometimes I'm just interested in guys. I don't think I'm more attracted to women than men, so much as I'm more attracted to feminine gender than masculine gender.

Someone with my characteristics isn't so easy to categorize, and you just want to avoid labels or any questions that might force you to label yourself with the short answer. As far as I'm concerned sexual orientation isn't an identity, but a preference, and a person's sex (as in gender) is only one element of who they are, not the sole element you fall in love with.

I should be able to do whatever... er, whoever I want without having to carry a membership card.

Valdimar · Joined: 12 Dec 2004 Posts: 711 Location: San Francisco

I totally agree with you. I feel that I am bisexual but have a heavier preference toward men. I'm definitely more attracted to the masculine gender, though I don't think I am able to label my own gender as anything less or more than androgynist.

I will admit that as I became to terms with my sexuality that I used the bisexual card as a means of a security blanket to help deny that I really was gay. In the long haul, I function better in a long term relationship with another guy. I've been in one for 6 years now.

You are right though that sexuality carries heavy on part of one's identity. Luckily, times are changing and sexulaity is becoming a less important part of one's identity. Then again, I may be biased since I live in SF.

Enoch · Joined: 29 Aug 2005 Posts: 8567

Like Val, I used the term "bisexual" as a security blanket for awhile....as I feel many gay men and women have. That is why, I feel, there is so much misunderstanding. So many times we watch those around us (if not ourselves) start by saying they are bisexual, before finally admitting they are homosexual. Unfortunately for people who are really bisexual, it gives the false idea that it is simply a case of "bi now, gay later."

I know several people who are bisexual. But, I know more who said they were bi, just to later admit that "bisexual" was a security blanket. It makes me feel bad for those people who get misunderstood because of the actions of others.

Melchior · Joined: 02 Oct 2004 Posts: 9284 Location: Palm Beach

Valdimar wrote: I totally agree with you. I feel that I am bisexual but have a heavier preference toward men. I'm definitely more attracted to the masculine gender, though I don't think I am able to label my own gender as anything less or more than androgynist.

Ah, so I'm not alone. I don't closely identify with a masculine gender, I'm not really effeminate either. I'm pretty neutral in that regard.

It seems to me there is attraction and compatibility, and how attracted to and compatible with sex and gender one is.

Valdimar wrote: I will admit that as I became to terms with my sexuality that I used the bisexual card as a means of a security blanket to help deny that I really was gay.

UrielsFyre wrote: Like Val, I used the term "bisexual" as a security blanket for awhile....as I feel many gay men and women have.

I know several people who are bisexual. But, I know more who said they were bi, just to later admit that "bisexual" was a security blanket.

Okay, I didn't realize that was so common. Now I have a better understanding of where the attitude comes from.

John Galt · Joined: 04 May 2004 Posts: 20672 Location: Minnesota

There was some NYT article -- I will try to find it -- about some study that showed that bisexual men were liars (and mostly all in reality homosexuals, althougth some were straight), and that bisexual women were actually bisexual. They did this by showing stimulus to see what responses the so-called bisexuals had. The article mentioned there is a long held belief within the so-called gay community that you are either gay straight or lying and the study gave creedence to it. Like I said I'll try to drag it up.

John Galt · Joined: 04 May 2004 Posts: 20672 Location: Minnesota

Aqui: http://www.nytimes.com/2005/07/05/health/05sex.html?ex=1278216000&en=5a82f18cadf2ad83&ei=5088&partner=rssnyt&emc=rss

Enoch · Joined: 29 Aug 2005 Posts: 8567

John Galt wrote: There was some NYT article -- I will try to find it -- about some study that showed that bisexual men were liars (and mostly all in reality homosexuals, althougth some were straight), and that bisexual women were actually bisexual. They did this by showing stimulus to see what responses the so-called bisexuals had. The article mentioned there is a long held belief within the so-called gay community that you are either gay straight or lying and the study gave creedence to it. Like I said I'll try to drag it up. Interesting. I'd love to see a journal article on that study.

(Not to downplay the NYT article, but academic articles tend to reproduce the quantitative data and statistics, along with methodology, hypotheses/research questions, and have an indepth discussion of implications and that would be fascinating to read and examine.)

But, yeah, very interesting.

Melchior · Joined: 02 Oct 2004 Posts: 9284 Location: Palm Beach

Quote: In the new study, a team of psychologists directly measured genital arousal patterns in response to images of men and women. The psychologists found that men who identified themselves as bisexual were in fact exclusively aroused by either one sex or the other

Sure, at the time. I already said my preference between women and men tends to alternate back and forth, I'm not sure if it's the same with other bisexual men (any input from male bisexual posters would be a appreciated).

They only did this test once?

Kt · Joined: 23 Jan 2006 Posts: 3806

Helena = -sexual

Melchior · Joined: 02 Oct 2004 Posts: 9284 Location: Palm Beach

Helena` wrote: Helena = -sexual

You are skillet-sexual?

Well I support you and your sexuality, just be sure to use prote... er, non-stick cooking spray.

Demonic Spoon · Joined: 20 Sep 2004 Posts: 6767 Location: Ohio

Pansexual.

Quote: Relating to, having, or open to sexual activity of many kinds.

Melchior · Joined: 02 Oct 2004 Posts: 9284 Location: Palm Beach

Demonic Spoon wrote: Pansexual.

Quote: Relating to, having, or open to sexual activity of many kinds.

I know what it means. It was just a joke...

Kt · Joined: 23 Jan 2006 Posts: 3806

Melchior wrote: Helena` wrote: Helena = -sexual

You are skillet-sexual?

Well I support you and your sexuality, just be sure to use prote... er, non-stick cooking spray.
You play dumb, but you know... :)

Helena likes humans, and maybe dolphins...

Demonic Spoon · Joined: 20 Sep 2004 Posts: 6767 Location: Ohio

Here ya go Helena

Hope I don't get in trouble with the mods for posting porno... :!oops:

Valdimar · Joined: 12 Dec 2004 Posts: 711 Location: San Francisco

Melchior wrote: Quote: In the new study, a team of psychologists directly measured genital arousal patterns in response to images of men and women. The psychologists found that men who identified themselves as bisexual were in fact exclusively aroused by either one sex or the other

Sure, at the time. I already said my preference between women and men tends to alternate back and forth, I'm not sure if it's the same with other bisexual men (any input from male bisexual posters would be a appreciated).

They only did this test once?
I would say that about 3 times out of 10 I can become sexually aroused by a female. My attraction to men is so much more intense which is also why I haven't had sex with a female in over 7 years. Also, I know what I want out of life in the long term, and that's not a relationship with a woman, so why waste my time?

*shrugs* I enjoy sexuality and beauty in all forms from lesbianism, bisexuality, homosexuality, gender-bending, androgynism, etc etc etc, therefore my input on this may be a little skewed.

Kt · Joined: 23 Jan 2006 Posts: 3806

Valdimar wrote:
*shrugs* I enjoy sexuality and beauty in all forms from lesbianism, bisexuality, homosexuality, gender-bending, androgynism, etc etc etc, therefore my input on this may be a little skewed.

That's kinda how I see it too, I don't just like men and women, but everything inbetween, everything that is outside of those labels, really a person's anatomy means little when it comes to love, I just don't care.

islandhopper · Joined: 16 May 2006 Posts: 364 Location: 10,000 Islands

UrielsFyre wrote: John Galt wrote: There was some NYT article -- I will try to find it -- about some study that showed that bisexual men were liars (and mostly all in reality homosexuals, althougth some were straight), and that bisexual women were actually bisexual. They did this by showing stimulus to see what responses the so-called bisexuals had. The article mentioned there is a long held belief within the so-called gay community that you are either gay straight or lying and the study gave creedence to it. Like I said I'll try to drag it up. Interesting. I'd love to see a journal article on that study.

(Not to downplay the NYT article, but academic articles tend to reproduce the quantitative data and statistics, along with methodology, hypotheses/research questions, and have an indepth discussion of implications and that would be fascinating to read and examine.)

But, yeah, very interesting.

Here you go:
Rieger et al; Sexual arousal patterns in bisexual men, Psychological Science. 16:579, 2005. No reliability data in this study and the outcome measures are questionable.

Enoch · Joined: 29 Aug 2005 Posts: 8567

islandhopper wrote: UrielsFyre wrote: John Galt wrote: There was some NYT article -- I will try to find it -- about some study that showed that bisexual men were liars (and mostly all in reality homosexuals, althougth some were straight), and that bisexual women were actually bisexual. They did this by showing stimulus to see what responses the so-called bisexuals had. The article mentioned there is a long held belief within the so-called gay community that you are either gay straight or lying and the study gave creedence to it. Like I said I'll try to drag it up. Interesting. I'd love to see a journal article on that study.

(Not to downplay the NYT article, but academic articles tend to reproduce the quantitative data and statistics, along with methodology, hypotheses/research questions, and have an indepth discussion of implications and that would be fascinating to read and examine.)

But, yeah, very interesting.

Here you go:
Rieger et al; Sexual arousal patterns in bisexual men, Psychological Science. 16:579, 2005. No reliability data in this study and the outcome measures are questionable.
Thanks! I'll have to take a look at that when I find the time. :-)

islandhopper · Joined: 16 May 2006 Posts: 364 Location: 10,000 Islands

UrielsFyre wrote: islandhopper wrote: UrielsFyre wrote: John Galt wrote: There was some NYT article -- I will try to find it -- about some study that showed that bisexual men were liars (and mostly all in reality homosexuals, althougth some were straight), and that bisexual women were actually bisexual. They did this by showing stimulus to see what responses the so-called bisexuals had. The article mentioned there is a long held belief within the so-called gay community that you are either gay straight or lying and the study gave creedence to it. Like I said I'll try to drag it up. Interesting. I'd love to see a journal article on that study.

(Not to downplay the NYT article, but academic articles tend to reproduce the quantitative data and statistics, along with methodology, hypotheses/research questions, and have an indepth discussion of implications and that would be fascinating to read and examine.)

But, yeah, very interesting.

Here you go:
Rieger et al; Sexual arousal patterns in bisexual men, Psychological Science. 16:579, 2005. No reliability data in this study and the outcome measures are questionable.

Thanks! I'll have to take a look at that when I find the time. :-)

No problem; I'd be interested in knowing what you think about the study.

toddytodd · Joined: 20 May 2006 Posts: 2736

People seem to be quick to classify things as 'X' or 'Y', then move on to something else. While that may be fine for certain things, it doesn't seem to work with other things, (specifically people). If society weren't so one-sided on sexuality, I don't think it would be a big deal at all. People run the gamut of sexuality; some aren't even sexual at all. It amazes me that we can send people to the moon, robots to Mars, clone animals, etc, but many can't even honestly speak about human sexuality.