Political Crossfire Forums

connermt · Joined: 27 Feb 2006 Posts: 1526 Location: CMH OHIO

After a few weeks of reading 'GOD vs GAY' & 'CHRISTIAN vs GAY' type topics, it made me wonder: How many Christians on this forum know gay people?
Do you work with them?
Are any of them your friends outside of work?
And if so, how do you treat them?

Same goes for gays, in reverse.
Do you work with them?
Are any of them your friends outside of work?
And if so, how do you treat them?

Here is the reason why I ask: If christians & gays interact & speak with each other in the same manner that they represent themselves with gay issues on the forums, is it any surprise that there is a rift between chrsitians & gays?

Enoch · Joined: 29 Aug 2005 Posts: 9530

Giving the gay male perspective:

I have several Christian friends. I don't agree with what they choose to believe, but I don't hold it against them. They know not to preach to me or attempt to convert me. I, likewise, don't preach to them or attempt to convert them to Wicca.

I believe the rift truly comes from the most vocal of each camp not taking the time to understand the other side. Some small minded gay men have a "Christians hate us" mentality that isn't necessarily true. Sure, some Christians may, but that does not mean all Christians do.

Likewise, some small minded Christians have a "gay people are trying to push their sexuality down our throats" mentality, which (again) isn't necessarily true. Yes, some gay men try to make the fact that they are gay the only thing that they portray to people, but that doesn't mean all gay men do.

It really comes down to people on both sides taking the time to understand one another.

connermt · Joined: 27 Feb 2006 Posts: 1526 Location: CMH OHIO

UrielsFyre wrote: Giving the gay male perspective:

I have several Christian friends. I don't agree with what they choose to believe, but I don't hold it against them. They know not to preach to me or attempt to convert me. I, likewise, don't preach to them or attempt to convert them to Wicca.

I believe the rift truly comes from the most vocal of each camp not taking the time to understand the other side. Some small minded gay men have a "Christians hate us" mentality that isn't necessarily true. Sure, some Christians may, but that does not mean all Christians do.

Likewise, some small minded Christians have a "gay people are trying to push their sexuality down our throats" mentality, which (again) isn't necessarily true. Yes, some gay men try to make the fact that they are gay the only thing that they portray to people, but that doesn't mean all gay men do.

It really comes down to people on both sides taking the time to understand one another.

I agree. However, I must say that I don't know ANY Christians that are as forceful & at times, condesending, as some (but not all) that I have encountered on these forums. Same could be said about gays as well. Prancing down the middle of the street in nothing but a G String is no way to win support, but neither is standing on the street corners telling everyone they are going to hell.
But honestly, I must say that I know more gays that march in G Strings than Christians that stand on street corners
:cry:

Lumina · Joined: 16 Mar 2006 Posts: 19330

connermt wrote: After a few weeks of reading 'GOD vs GAY' & 'CHRISTIAN vs GAY' type topics, it made me wonder: How many Christians on this forum know gay people?
Do you work with them?
Are any of them your friends outside of work?
And if so, how do you treat them?

Same goes for gays, in reverse.
Do you work with them?
Are any of them your friends outside of work?
And if so, how do you treat them?

Here is the reason why I ask: If christians & gays interact & speak with each other in the same manner that they represent themselves with gay issues on the forums, is it any surprise that there is a rift between chrsitians & gays?

That's just it; the anonymity of the 'Net allows some to speak and behave in ways that they wouldn't/couldn't in their ordinary real lives.

One of my godfathers was gay, and as children, my sister and I used to fight over who was going to grow up to marry him. Our parents always found this terribly amusing, but to their credit, they never said word one.
They loved him and saw him as a multi-dimensional human being who was also gay.

I am blessed to work in an environment that truly is don't ask/don't tell/don't care re sexual orientation and also religion. For this I am grateful. Always have been but particularly so since my daughter (21) came out a few years ago. She's still at a stage where she needs to make an in-your-face statement by her attire and etc.--she's immediately recognizable as a "baby dyke"!--but she is treated with as much respect and affection by my colleagues as she always has been.

I believe that understanding of one another comes from recognizing each person we meet as a unique individual created by God, not as only part of a category.

Just in case somebody is reading this who may have a sibling or child who also is gay, I was always frank with my children that I hoped they'd be straight because being straight is easier.

Is it "nature" or "nurture" (meaning life experiences)? In my daughter's case, I'd say an argument could be made for both.

How long did it take me to "accept" my child once she FINALLY came out to me? Oh, about ten seconds. I realized, as a Christian, that God gave her to me to love, not to judge. That's His job. I'm just her mother, and I love her and her brother unconditionally.

Well, at least I try! Sometimes I really, really don't like either of 'em. To which I'm sure they'd both reply, "Uh, ditto."

Gryff1nd0r · Joined: 12 Nov 2004 Posts: 2430 Location: Cambridge, MA

Experience with lesbians I do have. I know quite a few, and am friends with... oh... I would say friends with 2, good aquaintences with 5, and know at least a dozen who I see and speak to.

It bothers me when people speak of "gays" and then make some ridiculous statement about promiscuity or something along those lines. Gay men and lesbians are totally different creatures. I would say that a lesbian is further from a gay man than she is from a straight woman, and a gay man is further from a lesbian than he is from a straight man. They are at opposite ends of the spectrum in behavior IMO, so it is annoying when people lump them and refer to "gays". And almost everything negative said about "gays" pertains to only a percentage of gay MEN.

How do I treat them? Like any friend or aquaintence. Do we talk about these topics? Yes. Do I say the same things I say on this forum? Yes.

Todd D. · Posted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 8:57 am Post subject:

One of my absolute best friends whom I've known since 3rd grade is gay. We remain close to this day.

How do I treat him? Like I treat any of my friends. I wouldn't appreciate it if he started lecturing me about how illogical and terrible it is to be a Christian, so why would I do the same to him?

Enoch · Joined: 29 Aug 2005 Posts: 9530

Gryff1nd0r wrote: Experience with lesbians I do have. I know quite a few, and am friends with... oh... I would say friends with 2, good aquaintences with 5, and know at least a dozen who I see and speak to.

It bothers me when people speak of "gays" and then make some ridiculous statement about promiscuity or something along those lines. Gay men and lesbians are totally different creatures. I would say that a lesbian is further from a gay man than she is from a straight woman, and a gay man is further from a lesbian than he is from a straight man. They are at opposite ends of the spectrum in behavior IMO, so it is annoying when people lump them and refer to "gays". And almost everything negative said about "gays" pertains to only a percentage of gay MEN.

How do I treat them? Like any friend or aquaintence. Do we talk about these topics? Yes. Do I say the same things I say on this forum? Yes.

I agree, gay men and lesbians are very different. Gay men have fashion sense and decorum....lesbians like flannel and monster truck pulls. :lol:

[/joke]

Gryff1nd0r · Joined: 12 Nov 2004 Posts: 2430 Location: Cambridge, MA

UrielsFyre wrote: Gryff1nd0r wrote: Experience with lesbians I do have. I know quite a few, and am friends with... oh... I would say friends with 2, good aquaintences with 5, and know at least a dozen who I see and speak to.

It bothers me when people speak of "gays" and then make some ridiculous statement about promiscuity or something along those lines. Gay men and lesbians are totally different creatures. I would say that a lesbian is further from a gay man than she is from a straight woman, and a gay man is further from a lesbian than he is from a straight man. They are at opposite ends of the spectrum in behavior IMO, so it is annoying when people lump them and refer to "gays". And almost everything negative said about "gays" pertains to only a percentage of gay MEN.

How do I treat them? Like any friend or aquaintence. Do we talk about these topics? Yes. Do I say the same things I say on this forum? Yes.

I agree, gay men and lesbians are very different. Gay men have fashion sense and decorum....lesbians like flannel and monster truck pulls. :lol:

[/joke]

Gay men are also much mroe promiscuous and lesbains, at least all of the ones that I know, are completely monogamous and committed. They care about the sex much less than the relationship. In this sense, lesbians are more like hetero women and gay men are more like hetero men, but both are uninhibited... that allows gay men to be more permiscuous than straight men, and allows lesbians to snuggle and chat about their feelings as much as their hearts desire. :lol:

whatsthepoint · Joined: 17 Oct 2005 Posts: 1235

I have gay friends and i hold a strong Christan belief. I maintain my beliefs and i don't judge them for their beliefs, it's not my place to judge. In my eyes it's a sin, on the same point it's no more a sin in God's eye as lying, stealing, or immoral thoughts. If more people concerned themselves with the way they live instead of the way others live, the world will be a better place. Remember God comes to those when they are ready and willing. Never force your beliefs on another person.

TNBiologist · Joined: 31 Jan 2006 Posts: 962 Location: Tennessee

I work with a gay man and a lesbian and get along fine with both. I consider the gay man a friend as we do sometimes go out after work for a beer and we actually travel a lot together for work. He does not push any beliefs on me and I do the same. I am not close friends with the lesbian just because we don't have much in common but we work well together and have never tried to push an opinion at each other. I look at it as long as they don't hit on me or make out in front of me with thier partner (I believe this for straight people too, there is a place for that and the street corner it not it) then I don't care.

connermt · Joined: 27 Feb 2006 Posts: 1526 Location: CMH OHIO

TNBiologist wrote: I work with a gay man and a lesbian and get along fine with both. I consider the gay man a friend as we do sometimes go out after work for a beer and we actually travel a lot together for work. He does not push any beliefs on me and I do the same. I am not close friends with the lesbian just because we don't have much in common but we work well together and have never tried to push an opinion at each other. I look at it as long as they don't hit on me or make out in front of me with thier partner (I believe this for straight people too, there is a place for that and the street corner it not it) then I don't care.

Agreed. I don't like PDA regardless of who is doing it
:cry:

eynon · Posted: Mon Mar 20, 2006 9:24 pm Post subject:

My uncle in gay and I love him dearly, my best-friend from HS is gay and I care deeply for him, my g-friend is bi-sexual and I'm in love with her.

The Central Scrutinizer · Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 6:27 pm Post subject:

Eynon81 wrote: my g-friend is bi-sexual and I'm in love with her.

Sweet deal, isn't it? I love it when she takes me to the strip club.

eynon · Posted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 1:25 am Post subject:

The Central Scrutinizer wrote: Eynon81 wrote: my g-friend is bi-sexual and I'm in love with her.

Sweet deal, isn't it? I love it when she takes me to the strip club.

still gettin used to it actually :!oops:

snow · Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 669

Yes, one of my good friends is gay.

Addison · Joined: 08 Mar 2006 Posts: 126

I have no problem whatsoever with any gay people in any form or fashion. My male cousin is gay, and I love him like the brother my mother never bore. I have several homosexual friends as well, and love them as my friends. It is only those ignorant of the actual teachings of Christianity who believe that God truly hates gays and that they should do the same. It's a sad, sad thing.

LetsGetReal · Joined: 26 Aug 2004 Posts: 5791 Location: Peoria, AZ

I have one gay friend we've talked about our beliefs and no one gets personally offeneded. My dad has a close Gay friend who actually saved my life when I was a baby, so gays can't be all bad :). Jk with ya guys. The whole stereotyping of each of the groups is just asinine and should be ignored. It's the same as the belief that all muslims are terrorists.