Political Crossfire Forums

F'losrix · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 3:52 pm Post subject: Gaydar - myth or reality?

Give us your thoughts on the existence of 'gaydar' - the supposed means by which gay people recognize each other amidst the vast sea of heterosexuals.

Is gaydar something real? Is it a type of 'sixth sense' or just a mix of conscious/subconscious judgments we make based on stereotypes? What are the signs you look for when trying to determine whether someone is gay? Have those signals changed over time or are they static?

How accurate is your gaydar? Give us examples of when it has worked or failed to work, and why.

Feel free to add anything else you feel to be relevant.

Melchior · Joined: 02 Oct 2004 Posts: 9226 Location: Palm Beach

Oh yes, but I can't give you examples because I never actually dared to say: My gaydar is going off right now, can you confirm this please?

ToonArmyIsComing · Joined: 15 Feb 2005 Posts: 5888 Location: Ontario

It's a myth IMHO. I don't buy it ...

You can tell someone who is gay from things like their nonverbal facial expressions, their body language, and other things, but it's never 100% accurate.

PrinceJunius · Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2005 3:46 am Post subject:

Oh, I can always tell. I have mastered the art of noticing the subtle eye glances that accompany guys checking other guys out. Also, I am very good at noticing the insecurity closeted guys exhibit. I never approach anyone with my results, because I believe a person will come out when he's good and ready.

My gaydar doesn't work on lesbians or bisexuals, though. Other than that, I have never been wrong.

Gryff1nd0r · Joined: 12 Nov 2004 Posts: 2277 Location: Cambridge, MA

my gaydar picks up lots of false signals. i've never missed a gay, but i've misjudged lots of straight people

00timh · Joined: 08 Nov 2004 Posts: 12729 Location: upstate NY

I was in Cape Cod for a whale watch and I saw two guys kissing, my gaydar went off imediately. :lol:

George W Bush · Posted: Mon Jul 25, 2005 6:19 pm Post subject:

couldnt it be said that someone's 'gaydar' is just a manifestation of their own attraction to another person?

if that other person 'HAPPENS TO BE' gay then, score.

otherwise, your barking up wrong tree.

F'losrix · Posted: Mon Jul 25, 2005 11:10 pm Post subject:

George W Bush wrote: couldnt it be said that someone's 'gaydar' is just a manifestation of their own attraction to another person?

if that other person 'HAPPENS TO BE' gay then, score.

otherwise, your barking up wrong tree.
I have to disagree as far as my own gaydar goes - it gets tripped all the time by people to whom I feel no attraction whatsoever. I should note here that I don't view it as a sixth sense - more a mix of conscious and subconscious interpretation of various speech patterns, non-verbal communication and stereotyping. An extra second of eye contact is usually the first clue - usually confirmed when they open their mouth. Needless to say, there's a lot of gay guys that fly under my gaydar, and some false positives that leave me scratching my head.

That said, I'll certainly agree that there are gay guys whose claims of gaydar are mostly wishful thinking. I get pretty disgusted with that type who think every good looking, well groomed man has to be gay and will claim that any who say they aren't are just closeted or haven't realized yet that they're gay. It's stupid and ridiculous.

Sikoanalisis · Joined: 17 Jun 2004 Posts: 1234

I have a pretty accurate gaydar and I'm very heterosexual. I haven't had a single false positive yet.

00timh · Joined: 08 Nov 2004 Posts: 12729 Location: upstate NY

Although I made a joke about my gaydar going off when I saw two guys kissing, there is some truth to that in that I think with issues of gay rights and peoples acceptance of homosexuality, many straight people are now wandering around playing this guessing game of who is gay and who is not. Personally, I don't give it much thought. I guess my gaydar is never wrong because I don't try to use it much, so by the time a person's sexuality becomes a topic of conversation that I am involved in, the person has usually come out or has been caught in the act. I have been hit on twice by guys and the second time it happened I didn't even realize it. I just thought the guy was drunk and talkative. Later on the bartender told me that he had come in several times and had picked up or attempted to pick up guys but not making it overtly known.

I don't think we really need to spend so much time figuring out a person's sexuality. If gay people are open about their sexuality they don't try to hide their relationships. For those who are not open about it, it is because of personal reasons and they would prefer to keep it private. obviously some can hide it better than others.

Malencontreux · Joined: 25 Sep 2004 Posts: 1762 Location: Portland.

I have a pretty accurate gaydar. Just by the way they act, behave, subtle expressions, the sound of their voice, the way they dress ... their shag carpet Lol.

George W Bush: Most straights and guys can identify "queens" and trust me, I don't think many of us are really attracted to queens except other queens but then again, 2 queens in one house. Gonna make a great comedy.

Valdimar · Joined: 12 Dec 2004 Posts: 711 Location: San Francisco

My gaydar is quite accurate too. It's more of the notion that 'It takes one to know one'. I can pick them out whether they are in the Castro of San Francisco or in rural Idaho. It more the less comes down to expressionability whether its sterotypical or not.

Oriden · Joined: 13 Sep 2005 Posts: 324

When it comes to people who fit the stereotypes, it's pretty easy to tell who is gay.

My experience, however, is that most gay people really don't fit the stereotypes - I've met a ton of people you'd never be able to guess were gay. For those people, it's a lot more complicated, but you can still tell if you get to know them well enough.

For whatever reason, figuring out someone else's sexuality seems to be a prime concern for some - from my experience, usually homophobes who are afraid that every gay person is attracted to them. (and from their looks have NOTHING to worry about).

Some people's gaydars obviously are better than others - I get mistaken for gay all of the time. With coworkers, my friends, you name it. Haha, do they know something I don't? :lol:

Enoch · Joined: 29 Aug 2005 Posts: 8510

There are things that I look for when trying to figure out if someone is gay or not. Eye contact, body posture, manner of speech (and I don't mean the stereotypical lisp), manner of dress (which the metrosexual phenomena has made more or less a moot point), nonverbal cues, etc.

I have been right most often, but there have been gay men that I thought were straight and straight men I thought were gay.

George W Bush · Posted: Fri Sep 23, 2005 1:40 pm Post subject:

You cant discern sexuality on 'what you feel'.
You need more evidence.
Alot of teenagers are accused by their peers of being gay, simply because they dont have the same traits of Average Joe (watching football, burping and gawkin at women).
They get no break when this so-called Gaydar goes off.

The gaydar is a myth, and its basis is probably from wishful thinking or self-affirmation (meaning, you think anothers traits point to homosexuality just because you are homosexual and have the same traits).

Just my opinion

ToonArmyIsComing · Joined: 15 Feb 2005 Posts: 5888 Location: Ontario

George W Bush wrote: The gaydar is a myth, and its basis is probably from wishful thinking or self-affirmation (meaning, you think anothers traits point to homosexuality just because you are homosexual and have the same traits).

I completely agree with that.

Interestingly I took this test: http://www.okcupid.com/gaydar

"You impressively scored 80%"
"You personally got 16 of the 20 people correct and were better at recognizing girls than guys. Overall, you guessed better than 87% of all test takers."

F'losrix · Posted: Fri Oct 07, 2005 9:20 am Post subject:

ToonArmyIsComing wrote: George W Bush wrote: The gaydar is a myth, and its basis is probably from wishful thinking or self-affirmation (meaning, you think anothers traits point to homosexuality just because you are homosexual and have the same traits).

I completely agree with that.

Interestingly I took this test: http://www.okcupid.com/gaydar

"You impressively scored 80%"
"You personally got 16 of the 20 people correct and were better at recognizing girls than guys. Overall, you guessed better than 87% of all test takers."
Wow, I only got 65%.

"You personally got 13 of the 20 people correct and were better at recognizing girls than guys. Overall, you guessed better than 43% of all test takers."

Pretty scary that I'm better at recognizing lesbians than gay men - WTF is up with that?

Enoch · Joined: 29 Aug 2005 Posts: 8510

I got 80%

"You personally got 16 of the 20 people correct and were better at recognizing guys than girls. Overall, you guessed better than 87% of all test takers."

Cool.

curisz · Joined: 28 Jun 2004 Posts: 2099 Location: chicago

wow. I tried twice and got an 11 and a 12 and was better picking women. I work in Chicago's gayest neighborhood. I see dozens of gay men every day. I thought I had my gaydar tuned and refined like a frikkin Stradivarius. Oh the shame!!!! :!oops:

Winchester · Joined: 23 Aug 2005 Posts: 5938 Location: Montana

My gaydar doesn't work (would say it s*cks, but I don't like the mental image that pops into my head). :lol:

Took the test 2 times got a 40% and 60%. But you miss a lot of non-verbal communication just looking at snapshots.